Like any thing you want to enjoy as long as possible, the couple relationship requires a little attention from you. From time to time, it requires a “greening”, from time to time it’s indicated to get out of the daily routine and as someone, someday, somewhere... said: “You must not allow the dust to settle down.”
Even the most stable couples have their moments of crisis, the so-called “bad passes”. That's because after some time, we tend to believe that we deserve the partners we have, that they somehow became our property and since they are with us, we do not have to do anything more, because our “mission” ended once we conquered them. Thus, we feel entitled, even in duty, to focus our energy towards other more “important” domains in our lives. That is our human nature. Restless and in a perpetual search.
Sometimes we forget about the one beside us, we get “lazy”, but we never forget to ask. Sometimes both partners, falsely secured within the created relationship, forget about that “together” and they focuses on some hobbies or goals regarding career success, concerns that slowly, occupy their full time. After a while, they wake up sharing the same bed as two “strangers” and their feelings once searing, now suddenly appear as an annoying obligation...
You used to be inseparable. Where one was, there was the other... with time, however, interests began to divide, each one going in silent on “his way”. Common things from once don’t seem to have ever existed. You barely have the time to speak two words and those in a hurry, without paying too much importance if they even been heard.
The distance between us hurts...
It hurts for a while, then the suffering is diluted in the ocean of everyday problems...
What has to be done?
When you feel this is happening, do not sit in watching, hoping that “time will solve them all”. Take a stand. Immediately. It is very good for a couple to have different interests. It keeps the idea of a space of their own. We all have also individual needs.
But it is essential to also have time spent together. “Time for US!”
You used to have fun... every moment spent together was a reason of joy and harmony. For some time though, whenever you are together you argue and blame each other for every “little thing”. You started to get angry for absolutely insipid reasons, as if you do not “have space one of another”.
In a couple, tolerance and understanding “of the other” is extremely important. Everyone has bad moments, uninspired moments, when not wanting to “see” the painful truth, we prefer to “take revenge” on the one beside our soul. And how long can he/she bear it without responding to your provocation?!
And from such a reaction, there comes the counter-reaction and the counter counter-reaction... and so on until you find yourself in the middle of a huge scandal, came “out of nowhere”. The worst is that you openly accuse each other, under the form of reproach. It might be more appropriate that the reason of the “anger” to be told somewhat in the favor of each of you: “I know I've neglected you lately, but it was because I felt carelessness on your part!” This form facilitates more the communication and the clarification of “things left unsaid” or of “tensions without logical explanation”.
Put yourself in the other’s shoes for a few moments. You will be surprised how much you can discover!
You used to be the most elegant couple in your group of acquaintances. There was no moment not to adore the presence of the other one...
The attraction disappeared long time ago in the couple. Now you have become comfortable. The sexy makeup, shower after cooking, the desire to have an enviable figure disappeared... The interest of how he sits dressed in the house (boxers or pajamas are enough) also disappeared, the idea of going to the gym bores him, he drinks increasingly more beer...
But in a couple, maintaining sexual interest is a vital condition. You can consider it a kind of “magical” catalyst.
It sometimes happens not to find moments for ourselves. To be so preoccupied and tired that the time is not enough for us than to sleep.
But remember that no matter how much you work or you want the fulfillment of your aspirations or goals, everyone has the right to feel good... even for a few moments.
It is advisable to figure out what is bothering to yourself or to your partner, to not be afraid to talk about it, to make changes in your life, to do anything to make things right.
You can “conceive” a new beginning, rediscovering the joy of being together. Leave yourselves romantic messages through the house, send SMS, make each other surprises, date yourselves... or why not try some more “eccentric” stuff, alone or... There is nothing immoral, unusual or prohibited when it comes to save the “history” you have lived together.
Crisis situations are and will always be. Specific or common to all couples.
These were just a few brief examples, just to confirm that there are moments like this in the midst of other couples too. The good news is that there are solutions or answers for each of them. You just have to want to search for them!